Monday, April 11, 2005

Ups and Downs

Uhmm okay lets start with Thursday... had some fun laro ng Bilyar kasama sila Kuya PJ,Kuya Marlo, EJ, RJ, Miguel,Ryan and other peeps...ok lang masaya nothing unusual hang out lang bilyar tapos i got home read an Email Titled FYI... Turns Out Tita Thelma Died last April 1st...=( May God Bless Her Soul...=(

I feel really bad after learning about it.. medyo masama din ang loob ko since my buddy did'nt tell me about it...she was buried April 6th nalaman ko april 8 na...=( bought a fone card called the next night.. tapos asked him what happend? why he didnt tell me..? how was he?? and stuff like that...not really enthusiastic replies(Normal nya lang ata??????) tapos asked how his family was... Ok lang sakit sa atay ang dahilan na-comatose pa daw si tita before that..=(...tapos tanong sya kung kanino ko nalaman sabi ko kay lette..."ah.. tapos tanong ako kung galit pa ba sya sakin.. (long pause) "OO....Medyo" i said sana magka-ayos na tayo...(Pause...silence) I dont know what il do when i get back specially sabi nya lilipat na daw sila sa Batangas... sabi ko dalaw na lang ako sa kanila pag-uwi ko.. "Kaw Bahala..."

nde ko alam kung saan ako lulugar...will i give space or should i go there and TRY to fix/Salvage our friendship....when i get back or ano?? i know ive been here before; i tried my best with Bay but to no avail... pero im hoping the result on this one will be different pero im split in half... may part of me na I dont want to lower my pride again like last time kasi baka walang mangyari... there's a part of me that wants to try to fix it so that i have a peace of mind when i look back after so and so years and i can tell myself "You Tried Your Best..."

Pero knowing G ewan ko... grabe magtanim ng galit yun... kung sa bahay nga nya kayang nyang alang kausap ako pa kaya??? pero ewan ko ba...turns out his the Real more Stone Cold than i am...bahala na im somehow relieve that he's ok and stuff i just wish i was by his side on one of the times he's gonna need a friend...yun lang siguro ang regret ko...

pero i dont know siguro ever since then i was'nt welcome thinking about it reflecting through the years on how differently they act when im around ewan ko ba.. para bang epal lang ako sa "tropa" parang "transpo lang ako" yun lang i dont want to think about it that way i want to think about it as a genuine friendship while it lasted...pero i dont know right now that's how i feel...

realistically speaking...sakin nde ko alam im thinking about wat ifs scenarios pero i wanna try to think positive and be optimistic about it..siguro kung nde man mangyari ang inaasahan ko...i just wanna have the peace of mind knowing na i tried my best to salvage the friendship... maybe they'll see me when i race in Batangas Racing Circuit and maybe then they'll tell somebody that "Ah si JP Bacosa ung Race Car Driver....Barkada ko sya nung High school" ewan ko Bahala na Si Lord....

Thursday, April 07, 2005

Long while!

phewwwwwwww!!!! grabe tagal ko na nde nagppost ehehe bin really busy kasi!just had the most grueling weekend of my entire existence so far!!!grabe mga rapapips!! ehehehe

Monday was the worst!!! grabe Oral Report sa English tapos Same Time Research Essay was due and another Report for A/C!!!

tapos Tuesday Informal Report and Response Letter was due tapos ung mga Cover Letter and Resume din!!! tapos the next day which is Wed. may Exam!!! bukas naman my Report na due!!1 grabe! buti kahit papano nakaka-hinga na ko ng maluwag.. :D

ayun ehehe =D basta excited na kong umuwi!!!! =D